The Art of Being Unmessablewith: Being Present is the Greatest Present
We can all relate to the scramble to get gifts that people will want, that they will appreciate. Sometimes, they are disappointed with our choices, sometimes we are disappointed with peoples reactions or even with their gifts to us. How do you give the guaranteed best present of all…by being present with the people in our life vs. being preoccupied with your hopes, fears, wants or don’t wants.
Being with people, really being with them, get to know the people in your life. That may sound strange, but consider we often think we know people really well and we have actually stopped finding out who they are and what matters to them right now. We start to take people for granted and assume who they are is who they were in the past, we don’t bother learning something new about them. These few simple tips can give you access to the best present you can give the people you love.
- Choose a lucky recipient of this gift (you son, your husband, you sister, your boss, anyone you want to create something new and fresh with)
- Recognize your thoughts, opinions, judgements and past knowledge of that person
- Put it to the side
- Now, imagine you just met them, actually ask them questions that you would if you just met. (i.e. what are you working in right now.? What is a dream you have that you want to accomplish? If you could have anything, what would you want? What matters to you in life? What’s the best part of your life right now? What’s something you are dealing with that I can support you with?
Whatever you ask, be interested in what they say and who they are beyond the person who you “think” you already know…
- Now, bring a sense of discovery, wonder and delight to your potentially stale, static, predictable interactions that usually don’t even require them to be there in order to play out given you already know what they will say or do.
If you do the above steps, you can fall in love with the people in your life newly, create partnership and happiness for the holidays in a way that lights up your season in a lasting way.
Let me know what happens, the victories and the challenges.